Counterpoint: Literalists don’t practice all they preach

A few questions for some who tend to cite literal biblical passages to justify social and political opinions:

Deuteronomy 25:11: If the rules of the Old Testament are definitive, why aren’t there more one-handed women, since a wife defending her husband is supposed to lose an appendage?

Deuteronomy 23:2: If bastards aren’t allowed in temples of prayer, why do so many go, and how many may not be going to heaven who think they should be?

Deuteronomy 23:1: Are victims of testicular cancer not permitted?

Deuteronomy 22:20-21: If non-virgins are supposed to be stoned to death, shouldn’t there be fewer females and more men in jail?

Leviticus 26:27-30: Do many who believe in the literal word eat parts of their kids if they disobey God?

Leviticus 20:9: Should we eliminate children for cursing at their parents?

What should the penalty be for radio show hosts and clergy who favor selectively citing biblical passages to pander to their base?

Didn’t many white Southern ministers tell their constituents that God said enslaving African Americans was the right thing to do?

How about these as words to live by:

Have as much fun as soon as possible, with the least amount of risk for as long as you can.

Don’t do to others what you wouldn’t want them to do to you, unless you need to.

Forget what you give, value what you get, return what you borrow, replace what you break and forgive quickly.

Don’t offend many to benefit few.

Do the right thing when no one’s looking.

Leave others better off for having known you and the world a better place than you found it.

Don’t underestimate irrationality.

Don’t think more of what could have been than what may be.

And let everyone be happy in Greensboro as long as they’re not treading on others.

George Hartzman

1 comment:

g said...

"1. Leviticus 25:44 states that I may possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?

2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness - Lev.15: 19-24. The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.

4. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord - Lev.1:9. The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

5. I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself, or should I ask the police to do it?

6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination, Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this? Are there 'degrees' of abomination?

7. Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle-room here?

8. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should they die?

9. I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

10. My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev.19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? Lev.24:10-16. Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair, like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)"